The church: for the lost and lonely?

How do Christians greet one another? With a handshake most likely or a holy kiss if you are close to the person. What does a handshake convey? A lot apparently. During greet one another time, I shook a total of seven hands. Two of them were unsatisfactory and five just average. The average handshake will be when the other party will at least trained his or her eyes on me until the process of hand shaking is finished. Good morning is exchanged and no other exchange of information about one another. The unsatisfactory handshake usually is a distracted one, void of eye contact and done very reluctantly. One lady offered her hand but she was in such a hurry to greet the next person that she looked away as her hand touched mine. Another lady spotted a friend as she offered her hand to me that as the hand touched mine her eyes and mouth actually was communicating to someone across the pew.

How do you greet others in church? In the opening song, we sang ,"This is your house... where the lost and the lonely bring their burden and their care." Can the church really take care of the lost and the lonely who bring their burden and care? Not if each individual is so engrossed in their own little cliques that others are blatantly ignored or given the cold shoulder.

People I Found Hard to Respect

1. The class conscious elitist.
2. The one who think one race is more precious that another.
3. The one who practice double standard.
4. The one who expect special treatment and believe they deserve it.
5. The wimp who ran away from responsibility.
6. The intolerant.

Different Levels of Friendship

Do you have good enough friends you can call to help you move house or drive you to the airport and your request will not be seen as an imposition, in fact, if you don't impose upon them they will feel offended? My family have lived in Singapore for nine years now, I still have problem deciding who to put down for emergency contact person.

Sure I know a lot of people from church, from previous and current work place, and compatriots I met here. Relationship I developed over the past nine years are quite superficial in nature. Nothing like Jerry Seinfeld and his gang or Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Ross, Chandler and Joey.


This is my favourite song: You've gotta a friend

When you're down and troubled And you need some loving care And nothing, nothing is going right Close your eyes and think of me And soon I will be there To brighten up even your darkest night You just call out my name And you know wherever I am I'll come running to see you again Winter, spring, summer or fall All you have to do is call And I'll be there You've got a friend

I like the idea of having a friend so close that when I need her, with just a phone call, she will come running or flying (by commercial airline, of course). Sadly, such a friend is nowhere to be found or difficult to cultivate in modern Singapore. All is not lost, I have my husband and my children. I hope someday when my children live far away, they will consider running to be with me when I need them like a good friend.

Fortunately for Christians, we have an eternally true friend in Jesus. His friendship is guaranteed perfect. Here is another favourite song.

What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.

To be a person of influence

To be influential must be really nice. You get to steer situations to your liking. You can play around the components of the situation. In a church situation for example. If you are a person of influence, you can get your son selected to be a child reader. You can get the worship minister to include your daughter to show case her musical ability no matter how mediocre it is. Your grandchildren, all 5 of them, are in the pageant and one of them playing either Mary or Joseph.

How do you achieve a position of influence? One of the easiest way is through money. Financial contribution, especially a substantial one, can go a long way. Being useful and indispensable to the leadership is another sure thing. Contribute your time to the organization. But these require sacrifices of ones' money or time. The easiest way is to be a desirable company either by looking good, fashionable, and look pleasing or entertaining, funny, charming and excellent conversationalist. Having the correct lineage also help increases your influence. If your grandfather is one of the founding fathers of a school for instance, you stood a chance to be an influential PTA or e-parent member.

This reminds me to the verse "a gift opens the way for the giver" (Proverbs 18:16).

Also to Dale Carnegie's book How to Win Friends and Influence Others.

The above is a book I want my children to read. Lots of good tips on how to win friends and be influential.

Lesson From President Bush

Found in Strait Times, 4 September 2007, pg 19.

President Bush: "I cry a lot on God's shoulder."

"I try not to wear my worries on my sleeve. Self-pity is the worst thing that can happen to a presidency."

So often people indulge in self pity if not in our head then in front of close friends, cell group members, or any sympathetic ears. It is particularly nice to have people know of our plight. Things like the uncaring parents, mean siblings, self centered husbands/wives, ungrateful children, daughter in laws or son in laws who alienate us from our children and grandchildren, and others are favourite subjects.

However, we are called to unburden our load to God first, not others, because unburdening to others can have unwanted and disappointing effects. Our friends may not take it favourably. They may change their opinion on our person. And worst, we may become a stumbling block to an unbelievers or new believers.

Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke fits perfectly, and the burden I give you is light."
Matthew 11:28-30