To Love, Honor and Cherish

For a long time now, it perplexed me that many men of Singapore marry mail order brides from countries like China, Vietnam, and Myanmar instead of the local girls. The reason they give is because these foreign bride are simple women with simple needs, unlike local women whose demands are complex. What does that mean? Today, I can finally come to an understanding.

In a scene of a Chinese drama series my daughter like to watch, a Singaporean man was promising his Vietnamese bride that he will take good care of her, and that she will want nothing in the future. It struck me that the promise to take a good care is quite the standard wedding promise in Asian media. This, I believe, is also one of the contributing factors to the disengage between Singaporean men and women.

Singaporean women are known to be capable bunch and need no man to take care of them. In fact, the truth is, because they have a two-year head start to the men who has to serve national service, the women of Singapore are better off economically. They don't look to be taken care of. Instead, when they marry, they look to be loved, honored, and cherished. Although, I believe providing for her is part and parcel of to love, honor and cherish, it falls short somehow if it just stops there.

I am sure not all Singapore men are that inept in the romance department. Some Singapore men has the capacity to love, honor and cherish their women. However, if the media continue to portray the men as merely good providers, the women will continue to doubt their capacity and go for the ang mohs whom Hollywood successfully portrays as the more capable to cherish them.